3 Secrets To Having Difficult Conversations... Well
No-one likes a difficult conversation (well there probs are some people but they're either sadistic or Enneagram 8s, LOVE to all my Enneagram 8 friends!).
So what difficult conversation are YOU putting off at the moment?
Pluck up the courage and get into it!
Here are 3 secrets to have difficult conversations well:
1. Time and place
This is not what you think I mean! Most people think, "When it comes to having a difficult conversation, I need to get someone ready and give them three weeks to prepare mentally."
Instead, take my next tip into account and try to make the time and place... NOW and hallway conversations. I know it sounds counter-intuitive but stick with me!
2. Pick small and specific
We don't want to micromanage people so we don't 'go there' when it's only a small issue.
We pat ourselves on the back but then things blow up 18 months later when we try to address 40 things in one mega conversation.
Ironically, trying to help the person initially by not addressing that small thing ends up hurting them.
That makes difficult conversations really really hard!
So start small and specific and go there in a hallway so the difficult conversation is something addressable and you can get a little win without having to do a big battle.
3. Stay calm
When you have a difficult conversation, sometimes you'll get no pushback and other times the other person feels extremely triggered and reacts.
Don't react back!
Stay calm and diffuse the situation. Be a themostat, not a thermometer.
Set a temperature in the conversation that is cool, calm and collected.
I hope these 3 secrets help!
If you want more secrets like this, you can download my resource "The Leader's Guide To Difficult Conversations" for FREE by clicking here.